Photo: Courtesy of Lilliana Vazquez
Santi is here!
“I don’t know if I have the words to really describe those first few seconds when Santiago was finally in my arms. It felt like a lifetime of desire, love, joy and hope washed over me,” Vazquez, 41, tells PEOPLE.
“I’m crying now just thinking about it. I remember looking at him with absolute wonder and amazement and thinking how blessed we are to get to share our lives with him. Nothing else mattered at that moment, and I mean nothing else, not even the fact that on the other side of the curtain behind my son, they were literally putting me back together.”
“He erased all the pain, the struggles and the battle wounds left over from six years of fighting for this very moment,” she adds. (Vazquez opened up to PEOPLE abouther journey with IVFwhen she announced her pregnancy.)
Courtesy of Lilliana Vazquez
Vazquez says “everything went according to plan” thanks to the medical team at UCLA’s Ronald Reagan Medical Center in Los Angeles.
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“One week later, when I hear the first two notes from the song that was playing when they put Santi on my chest, I break down into one of those ugly Oprah cries!” she says.
“Patrick and I have been just the two of us for 15 years so we’re ready to share our life with Santi — learn about who he is, who he wants to be, and seeing adventure and discovery through his eyes,” she adds.
“My heart is so full right now, watching Lilliana become a mother has been the most challenging and rewarding chapter of our relationship so far,” adds McGrath. “I’m so excited for Santiago and all the adventures we have ahead of us as a new family.”
Vazquez says she’s “thrown out” all of the preconceived sentiments of parenthood.
“Trust me, you will do things you swore you’d never do, say things you used to roll your eyes about and laugh at how much you thought you knew about motherhood, parenting and just surviving a newborn,” she says. “Thinking about all of my lists and rules and preferences makes me laugh — but not too much, remember C section! — at 4 a.m. when Santi is up for what feels like his 87th meal of the day.”
Vazquez and McGrath exclusively announced their pregnancy news with PEOPLE back in March.
“It was just complete and over the top elation,” she said at the time. “I don’t think it’s a feeling I’d ever really felt before.”
It was a long process getting to her positive pregnancy test. Vazquez started her in vitro fertilization and intrauterine insemination journey back in 2015 and the pair eventually got used to experiencing loss.
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Several weeks after treatment last year, the couple got the news that there was a heart beating in her belly. “I thought it was a prank call,” she said with a laugh. “I’m 40 years old and I’m pregnant for the first time, and so I think when you’ve experienced so much loss… it hardens you and it makes you so scared.”
“It’s heartbreaking to say, but for the first trimester every day, I was like, ‘Is today the last day I’m going to be pregnant?’ " she added “It took a long time for me to get out of that phase to feel like, ‘Okay, Lilliana, you can’t be afraid. You have to let this feel like what it is, which is a miracle.’ "
Vazquez has been open about her infertility struggles and continues to use her platform to offer advice to other women experiencing similar challenges.
“It’s important we begin to normalize that this beautiful yet often challenging time in life is different for each one of us — our journey to motherhood and through it, like our babies, will be unique and one of a kind in this world,” she recently shared onInstagram.
Adding, “So to all the other Mom’s, soon to be Mom’s and wishing to be Mom’s struggling with feelings that the world doesn’t quite understand, I am you and I’m here for you. ❤️”
source: people.com
